Shannon's adventures

Returning to Juneau in January

I returned to Juneau to a total wreck of an apartment:Boxes everywhere, piles of clothes on the floor, trash un-emptied. I had just started moving in to my new place when I left for Tulsa the month before. So when I got home I cleaned up the place and organized it, but realized that I had no place to put my socks, underwear, tee-shirts, etc. I got online and went to FreeCycle.org and found someone that had a dresser that they were giving away.

I went and picked it up and it just barely fit in the back seat of my Subaru. By just barely I mean I had to push down on the seats so the cushion sank a little, and I had to roll down the windows so the doors would close. I even had to scoot both of the front seats forward and tilt the up so that I could squeeze it into the back seat. I couldn't put it in the back hatch because the hatch doesn't open - because it was smashed in last fall when the streets first iced over and a guy in a pickup slid into me. So - with no small effort I got it into the back seat. When I drove away I immediately realized that I couldn't see out the back. Not by turning around, not by the rear-view mirror, not out the side windows, just out of the side mirrors. I didn't find anyone to help me move it from the car into my new apartment, so I left it in the back seat for a day.

Friday I called all of my guitar students and consolidated all of my lessons on Saturday - so that I started teaching at 2 p.m. All of them, that is, except for one - the one that was to be first at 2 p.m.. I left several messages on their phone saying "Our lesson is no longer at 1 p.m., it is now at 2. Please call me back to confirm." They didn't.

Saturday as I was getting in the shower, the phone rang. It was the music store calling to say "You have two guitar lessons here waiting for you!"

Drat. They hadn't gotten the message. So I said "I'll be there as quickly as I can."
I took a super fast shower, got dressed, grabbed a bagel and smoothie, and jumped in the car.

The drive to the music store is about 9 miles, so I thought I'd take advantage of the time and call mom. I hadn't called since I arrived back in Juneau. She actually answered her house phone, so I put her on speaker phone and drove fast in the rain. The phone in one hand, a peanut-butter bagel in the other, and a smoothie between my knees, sidways rain, and I was speeding. I didn't pay attention to how fast, just faster than traffic. I turned off the highway, down the street to the music store, signaled left, turned in the parking lot, and turned left into a parking space. A light caught my eye. I looked out the window to see a trooper pulling in the parking lot behind me. "Crap. I gotta go. I'm getting a ticket" I said to mom and hung up.

I stepped out of the car and shut the door. The trooper parked behind my car, blocking me in, as if I were going to suddenly decide to flee. I waved to him and put my hands in the front pocked of my Fish and Game hooded sweatshirt (of course my hood was up over my head - I was cold). He stepped out of his truck and said "Take your hands out of your pocket and keep them where I can see them." So I did. "Please get back in your vehicle." Ugh. So I did. It was raining, so I had to close the car door, which meant I had to roll down the window, which meant I had to turn the key on, which meant my reverse lights lit up (because reverse is the "park" gear, you know). I'm sure that freaked him out even more than a guy with peanut butter and honey on his face wearing a dark hood with his hands in his front pocket. He stepped up to the window and said "License and registration please." I handed them to him.

"Where are you hurrying to today?"
"Here, I work here."
"What's the rush?"
"I'm late for a guitar lesson."
"Oh, you work here?"
"Yes."
"Is there anything else involved - alcohol, drugs?"
"No."
"Are you aware of how fast you were going?"
"Umm, no, I guess not. I wasn't paying attention."
"Well, when you passed me on the on ramp, I was going about 60. I clocked you for a couple of miles and you were going 7 or 8 miles an hour faster than that." '
Whew. For a second I thought he said "70 or 80" and my heart sank.
"Oh." Then I thought "He followed me for miles and miles, and I had no idea, because I couldn't see anything behind me. I really hope he didn't have his lights on that whole time. Man that would be embarrassing. But it sure would have been funny - all those people I passed on the highway, watching, saying "Look at that idiot not pulling over for the trooper."

"So, no drugs or alcohol. Was there some other distraction?"
"Yes, I was on the phone with my mother."
"I saw you on the phone. But as long it's not texting, it's still legal."
"Nope, I was talking, even had it on speakerphone to be safer."
"Are you aware that your tags have expired."
Oh crap. "Yes, actually, I am. You see, I bought this car last year," (man this is going to be a long story) "and" (wait, I don't want to tell him all the details) "well, I work for Fish and Game (man, I better get my story straight) and when I finally got back in town after being in field camp all summer, I registered the vehicle and got new plates."
"Your tags expired in April.That was nine months ago."
"Yes, well, you see..."
"This registration is for a different vehicle. Do you have the registration for this vehicle?"
"Yes, that's what I'm telling you. That is the registration for this vehicle."
"But is says license plate FRNXXX, and this vehicle has different plates."
"I know. Before I could put the new plates on, I was in an accident. If you look in the back of the car, you'll see a small dent near the hatch handle. It doesn't look like it, but that dent keeps the door from opening. You can try to open it if you want. Anyway, when I took it to the shop, they said they would need the car for a month to fix it. So I called the insurance company and they said NOT to change the plates while the car was in the shop because they had it in their records with the old plates, and if I changed them, they wouldn't recognize the car when they did the claim."
"So the insurance company told you not to put on your new plates?"
"Yes, that is correct."
"I've never heard of that."
"Well, me neither, but that's what they said. It's Geico. I can give you the number if you want to call them..."
"No, just sit tight. I'll be back."

Crap. "Sit tight" always means they are not only going to run a check on my license but write me a ticket.
So I sat there getting bummed about being even later to my lesson, how much the stupid speeding ticket would be (12 over is a lot more expensive than less-than-10 over), and how much the stupid plates fine would be, and how ridiculous my story must have sounded. He surely was thinking "Yeah, I've heard 'em all, buddy. Insurance company told you not to put on your new plates. Ha." He'll probably even figure out some way to fine me for having a giant dresser crammed in my car so that I can't see anything. And I bet expired tags is separate from wrong plates. This is going to cost me a fortune. Dang it. (or if you're from Fairbanks: DANG!)

He finally walked back up. I rolled down the window. He held out my license and registration and said "I saw your new plates in the back. You need to get those on. I don't care what the insurance company said. Slow down and drive more carefully. Have a nice day." And walked away.
I sat there stunned.
Pleasantly.